Last night I was chatting to mate of mine and we got talking about slapping people in the face. He said he would hate to be on the receiving end of one of my slaps seen as I punch like a man (thanks Beers). It is a hug insulting thing to do to someone and is as low as going for a man’s crown jewels. This got me thinking to the last time I actually slapped someone.
My oldest friend in the world, we will call her Candy, because she is really really phenomenal eye-candy, and I used to fight so badly they wouldn’t have put us on Jerry Springer. (Bear in mind we lived in Boksburg back then) We hit each other with belts, wet towels, basically anything that would cause a welt and sting. We regularly slapped each other so hard the hand prints remained for hours. Many times our parents would come home and we would have bright red faces from slapping each other so hard. I pushed her into a cupboard once, she pushed me to the ground. I slammed the door in her face so hard, paint came off. This was all before we were 12, before we had grown up a bit. Now we don’t fight at all but we always marvel at how we used to lay into each other. People who hear these stories and know me well cannot believe it, I guess once I left the Burg I didn’t need my fighting skills anymore.
There was one occasion when we were very proud of our slapping abilities, this time someone else was on the receiving end and had to face the wrath of both of us. Candy has a little sister and when we were in STD 5 she was in grade 2. Was an incredibly cute kid and Candy and I used to give her a pretty hard time, but we were also very nice older sisters. A few of us, when we were in STD 5, were in a war with the girls in the year below us. I believe it was over sitting rights of a particular bench. So one of their boyfriends and his mate who was our age came to the school one day after a particularly intense fight, and stumbled across Candy’s little sissy. They pushed her to the ground and called her some mean names. This was all kinds of unacceptable. Candy and I gave those boys a nice red face and ear they will never forget. (After a good talking to first of course). In the mean time the rest of our mates were taking down the girls in the lower year.
People laugh when I say be careful I’m from the Burg, they look at me and say, yeah you really rough cuteness…
Remain Infinitely Cute
XXX
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PMS and CBS, a combination that should never be and yet cannot exist apart. Head for the lifeboats, MEN and children first....
Amatomu...
3 comments:
Wahahaha! Now a kick in the nuts - that gets any guys full attention ;)
OH MY GLORY, this was scary! Thank goodness you clarified that this was before you were 12, I was beginning to get nervous about ever bumping into you ;-)
Most people marvel at the freakish strength my sisters and I have. With me, this developed from having to have a gut survival instinct. They used to tie me to a chair and lock me in my room and I'd have to get free or they'd hold me under the water and I'd have to force myself up for air... I thought it was playing but it was really their way of getting their baby sister out of the way. Thank goodness we adore each other now and would never raise a hand to each other - I think it'd be sudden death if we did ;-)
chews - very below the belt in my opinon, no pun intended...
Boldly, hahaha... my ex maintains i punch like a man. i think older siblings toughen us up??? i do understand the sudden death thing, altho sadly i think i would be the dead one! ifi ever have a prob i think ill give u a call :) we could be a dangerous team haha
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