Player Update

View United is battling! We have lost some of our best players, including recent MPPs. The situation is diabolical with 2 players sitting on the bench and only 1 player scoring goals. Here is a recent player summary.

Coach and masters are still participating in friendlys as they have been from the beginning. Their roles remain the same and they perform them with the same high levels of skill as before.

Doc has gone into retirement. In fact, she barely participates in friendlys. Although she does come to the match, she just sits on the bench absorbed in Durban. Yes, Durban was the one that forced our reigning MPP into retirement. In fact, one could say they are the admin staff of View United. This is because their admin has created some interesting situations. The rest of the team, like most people, cannot stand the admin but it appears they have to deal with it. Needless to say the admin is ALWAYS silly, which just frustrates the team more. However, Durban now has someone to dye his hair for him.
The storms along the coast line recently were not cause by the alignment of the earth, moon and sun as people seem to believe. It was in fact caused by Durban’s disgust over being called a groupie, he believes he should be on the team. I did however manage to show him that he didn’t want the stigma and public humiliation of scoring an own goal. Incest is still a crime here, we are not in Utah people.

Tit is also in retirement but she participates in friendlys whenever the aging family does not require feeding at their birthday dinner. Her groupie, though not new on her scene, is a bit of a new-comer to The View United Fan/groupie Club. Von Dutch(man) has made few appearances because he has been away so not much to report on him just yet, I’m hoping to see a little more from this groupie as the others have been so committed in the past.
Token and myself have found our way back to the bench. Actually Token never left the bench in all honesty. Although he attempted to kick something the other night, it wasn’t actually for any form of game play and he kicked me instead, bruising my ankle.

Our MVP Delicious is the only one earning her paycheck! She is now the MPP too. Watching this girl play is jaw dropping. Her skill and perfection are so evident, her game play is smooth and confident as she commands the field. When out on the field the other teams are attracted to her like moths to a flame baby!!! She is carrying View United, like Johnny Wilkinson carried the English team to victory through the last world cup. Delicious will not suffer any pain (particularly in her back) for carrying the weight that is View United as her skills are unmatchable and irresistible.

What looked like a promising season for the team has turned into a season scarred by scandal and player loss. The vast number of their supporters are worried about the remaining players and the evident lack of commitment shown by the other players.

Remain Infinitely Cute
XXX