High Maintenance

Well hair is not a girl’s friend. We spend our time plucking, shaving, waxing, trimming and dying. One can eliminate the hair removal problem with permanent laser hair removal. Although there is nothing like sitting in a disposable g-string with an ice-pack giving you frost-bite on your va-jay-jay with your legs spread and twisting in unnatural ways while a woman sits there wearing protective eyewear zapping away your hairs. There is less dignity in that then having it waxed, if one can believe it. Luckily underarms aren’t so intrusive so every second month I get a reprieve. Shaving is also no fun and I cannot wait until I'm big to have my leg-hairs lasered let me tell you. Every time I shave my legs I need a blood transfusion, shaving something I just haven’t mastered. Plucking isn’t painful literally but it is a pain in the ass.
And then there is the hair on the head. Hair that is my length is very very high maintenance! At least I no longer spend 3 and a half hours (yes 3 and a half) in the hairdresser since I returned to my brunette roots. Being blonde is just ridiculous to keep looking decent and not like someone dropped shoe-polish on my roots.

So today I headed off to the hairdresser for my monthly trim. An hour later I come out looking like an Elvive model, there is a gust of wind and my hair wushes up making me look just worth it.
Now I love it when people play gently with my hair, gives me such nice goosies! And never mind the head massage you get while having your hair washed. Its complete bliss. Then this woman walks in with this nasal voice that goes straight through my head. I look up and see a +/- 70 year old woman with a huge blonde quaff and so much makeup I can hardly believe there is any left in the world. Her eyeliner is similar to what I imagine Tutankhamen would wear. Thick solid black lines just above and below the lash line, extending to her mid-temple. She was wearing a little brown lace cammy (70years) and no bra (70). The dart-things that are usually just below the bust line were sitting above her breasteses. TOOO MUCH

Now this completely pointless and unrelated semi-rant results on 2 toasts….
To permanent hair removal which I will use everywhere possible!
And to growing old gracefully.

Remain Infinitely Cute
XXX